Mockery at boot process.
In order to competently infuriate Windows 95 during the boot process, add to autoexec.bat as many resident programs like "Calc", "Side Kick" etc as only possible.
It is also desirable that all these programs are written in Pascal. For the swap file do leave some 50 kB - this will amuse Windows 95.Write a small resident routine, able to delete the swap-file every two minutes as well as all the files in TEMP directory. After every fall of Windows 95 prevent Safe-Mode load and choose regime Logged (\BOOTLOG.TXT) to make it register on its own all the stages of its shame in this file.
However good results can be obtained when using the regime Step-by-step confirmation - make sure you prohibit the load of the most important drivers.
And the most exquisite mockery is to extract the memory from the computer.
Leave some 4 MB, take Britannica encyclopedia and sit near the computer for a week, or two, waiting for WinWord boot and from time to time endearingly repeating: "Well, Danila-master, does the Stone Flower come out?" (from the Russian fairy-tale).
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